A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. They order a few drinks, chat, and walk out.

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What is the difference between a Mexican and a bike? they both get hit by cars in shady neighborhoods, like Copiague, New York

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An elephant walks into a bar. Several people are trampled.

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How tall is a tree? Taller than the ground

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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What is red and cry's? A baby chewing on a razor blade

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What did the tramp get for Christmas? Nothing because he's Jewish.

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

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Why did the boy throw the clock out of the window? Because it was broken.

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5 Italian guys from Long Island

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a school bus? A dog and a school bus are not sexually compatible and therefore they cannot reproduce.

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What do you call Jack Black on a bad day? Kevin Hart.

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Why couldn't the 13 year old get into the pirate movie? He has cancer and is dying in the hospitable.

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What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

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How do unwed mothers celebrate Mother's Day? The same way all mothers do.

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What do a Siamese cat and a birch tree have in common? Both exist.

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What do you call someone who is bad at hand eye co-ordination? Dispraxic

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13 =B you just learned something

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Q: what do you call a deer with no eyes A; roadkill

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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My grandma told me to always keep my head up and just keep going. She fell down a manhole last week and died.

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what did batman say to robin before they got in the car get in the car

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Dane Cook makes a joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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