An englishman, a german and a ginger are in a band. they play some creative music that some people may find enjoyable to listen to and would like to purchase a track.

Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet You have pancreatic cancer

What did the man on the moon say? Nothing. He died because his supply of oxygen ran out.

An old man walks into a bar. He suffered greater injury than a younger man due to his advanced age and deteriorating health. But he did eventually recover by strictly adhering to his doctor's advice of bed rest, improved diet, and increased, yet moderate, aerobic exercise.

why is the spine-tailed swift the fastest bird? because its faster than the second fastest bird.

A black man walks into a bar in an all white neighborhood. He has a couple of drinks, pays for them, and politely calls a taxi for a ride home.

Why did Kelsey run out of eggs? Horses don't have much sperm.

Knock knock. "Who's there?" "It's Mr. Johnson, your next door neighbor." "Come on in."

Why did the bird fall out of the sky? It had no wings.

If rocks were people, what would you call a bunch of marble rolling down a hill? Rocks don't have the ability to be people.

What you call it when 8 goes over 4? An improper fraction.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

so you're waling through the desert and a tire falls off your canoe. How many pancakes does it take to shingle a doghouse?

I wife my butt after I poop. I poop out of my penis.

What disease did Harry Styles get? 1Infection! (if you don't know, Harry Styles is 1direction's manager)

What do you do when you see a hot girl in your bed

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead......

What did the asian boy's parents say when he came home with a report full of b-pluses? "You did well, but try harder next time."

Why did the mexican jump over the fence? It was a shortcut.

How many Cancer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Cancer does not affect one's ability to install light bulbs.

What is red and smells like brown feces? Bloody feces

I am black. And i will beat your children. At checkers. They can be the red .

A man walks into a bar. I don't remember the rest, but your mother's a whore.

A bar walks into a man. No, firstly it wasn't a man and secondly the bar didn't walk in. The pedophile just slid it in and sodomized the poor boy.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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