I want some pudding. but I didn't have my meat. how can I have pudding?

If Santa and a Blonde woman jump off a building who hits the ground 1st? They both do due to Galileo's discovery of two objects with different masses but similar densities hit the ground at the same time.

Knock knock. Who's there? Schizophrenia.

Scrooge McDuck dives headfirst into his pool of gold coins... He breaks his neck from the impact of the landing and dies.

Why did little Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms knock knock who's there? Not little Suzie.

What did the chicken say when it layed the square egg? Ouch.

Why did The white man loose his black friend? Because he ran away.

Where does Charlie Sheen buy his clothes? Winners

What do you get when you breed a dog and a cat together? A call from the RSPCA.

Why couldn't the journal cross the street? Because there was a red light.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Oh, I thought you could tell me. I will ask someone else. See you later.

What did the elephant say to the naked man? "Cute, cute, but can it pick up peanuts?"

A sad guy walks in to a bar and the bartender asks, what's the matter? The guy responds, I just found out i'm deaf

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.

How old was the baby when it took its first steps? That question is impossible to answer due to the fact the parents had an abortion and the fetus remained unborn.

A japanese man enters a Honda dealership and is approached by an eager salesman. The salesman shows him a few models and then asks him curiously "What do they call Honda in Japan?" The japanese man answered "Honda"

My dog poops u pick it up if i poop ill say f@#% you eat it DumbS%^&

If there's something strange in you neighbourhood, who you gonna call? my mate Jonno who has a gun.

how do i know if my husband is cheating? beat him until he tells you

what did the chickpea say to the raison when he got called big but? Atleast i dont have a stick up my but.

What did one skeleton say to the other? Nothing... Skeletons don't have vocal cords

dont be races! be like mario he is a italian plumer , he works for a white princess , catches coins like a jewish guy and he jumps like a black guy.

One day there was 2 black guys in hoodys with knives in there hand. They tapped me on the shoulder and took my groceries. They then made me a jam sandwich and went on there way

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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