How many chickens does it take to cross the road? It only takes 1 chicken to cross the road. You don't need a lot.

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What happened when Suzy fell off the swing? She hurt herself.

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What do you get when you cross the ocean with a dinosaur? Wet.

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If a chicken and a half lays an egg and half in a half of a day how long does it take a monkey with a peg leg to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle?

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What is the worst joke to tell a Orphan? Knock Knock Who's there Not your parents ( Man than slams door in little girls face)

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Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.The chicken was very distressed and trying to get away from the angry mob that followed close behind it.The chicken was never seen again. If you see a distressed chicken please contact your local police station.

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How does a chubby baby eat his chili In a very chubby way with his hands smearing it all over is face

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What starts with f and ends in u-c-k? a:****

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A drunk man into a bar. He is ripping apart a family

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What does a man want more than sex? Nothing.

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whats red and green and has 8 wheels. a stick

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Enough Red to share, RAWR! With me only though! But hey, do me a favor wear your glasses not your contact lenses. "That anime" do you watch anime? Or hentai or whatever?

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Drew Knowles is gay

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Why doesnt a chicken wear pants? Because its pecker is on his head.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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What did the farmer say to the chicken? Nothing, the farmer was arrested for having sex with a chicken.

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Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

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Im about to rewrite History....... History

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What did the one man say to the other man? What? I don't know , I wasn't there, that's why I'm asking.

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What did the librarian say to the three black men in the library? Nothing. Those three men were Harvard graduates and were very respective of libraries, and thier policies.

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Roses are red Violets are blue this doesn't rhyme i like trains.

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What's pink fluff? Pink fluff. What's blue fluff? Pink fluff holding it's breath. What's red fluff? Angry pink fluff. Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a tr-- No. What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple, 'cause the other half's in your mouth. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Angry pink fluff. What's worse than angry pink fluff? The holocaust. That's not funny. Stop laughing.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? I'm sleeping with your wife

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Whats the difference between a soccer ball and a baby? Babies cry when I kick them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops