"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You already had me chained to the bed. You didn't have to break both of my legs, Kathy Bates."

What kind of movies do pirates like? They don't know, Somalia doesn't have much of a film industry.

A guy punched himself. He then said ouch.

why was the Jewish person accused of stealing money? because the police found his finger prints.

How do you say hooker in Chinese? ?

Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Well, it all depends on the size of the bathtub.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why can't a chicken cross a road without it being questioned?

how do you kill a blond? there are many ways but every one of them is illegal and could be criminally chargeable.

Why did the monk shave his head? So he's more aerodynamic.

How do you put in a lightbulb? Call your local electrition

Q: What did the homless man get for chritsmas? A: Frostbite

I was typing a new book today (literature wild west, and I realized I had been writing the same shit over and over again for eight hours and was dead tired when It went so..) Welcome to the wild west, guns! Hayballs! MONSTER TRUCKS! And then I kinda thought to myself... Is it just me or am I trying a bit too hard? So guys? What do you think, am I trying a bit too hard here? Funny story, I am tired and drank lots of coffee, so I am holding back in order to not try so hard... Not trying hard enough to hold back? I am asking you! WHY? BECAUSE YOUR ANSWER DOES NOT MATTER! ARE WE GAME?

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks the duck "What'll it be?" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck and it can't talk.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate you so suck on poo.

Q: Why is it when geese fly in a V that one side is longer than the other? A: There are more geese on that side.

What do you call a small chinese person? They prefer the term little person to the term midget.

How do you get a one-armed clown out of a tree? Hit it in the face with an axe.

Rawan what are you looking at, stop reading this

An Atheist sneezed. Everyone around him said, "God bless you." He thanked them and continued on with his day.

Roses are black. Violets are black. Black people are black, And you're a douche.

What do black people and tables have in common? Nothing.

What did the Hungarian say before he went to bed? "I'm going to bed," but he said it in Hungarian.

How many women does it take to changed a light bulb? 12. 11 to form a committee and 1 to make her boyfriend do it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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