Why did you mom shop at Wal-Mart? She had a coupon

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what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

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What was little Sarah's last Words to johnny before he got hit by the bus??? Can i have your ice cream.

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Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Run it over with a lawn mower!

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Jack Stevens

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Why did the fat ugly bald Jewish man go to the bank? He needed to take out some cash because he was going out for lunch at a highly recommended restaurant.

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The next sentence is true. The previous statement is false.

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America's Got Talent WIN! Britian's Got Talent WIN! Mexico's Got Talent WTF!

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, That's what they tell me because I'm blind.

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Who invented chocolate? I don't know! Keep it to yourself.

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knock knock Goodbye

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Why did the man eat the turnip greens? Because he was morbidly obese, and needed to maintain a proper diet.

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Guess what? I like trains.

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What do you call a cat with 1 eye, 4 legs, and its tongue out? Road kill.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the ocean? Bob

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Chris. Chris who? Wow, I thought we were better friends than that.

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There was a asian jew and a black man standing at a bus stop wht do you call the Freinds

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A: Why do you look like a dog? B: Idk.

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What do you call a Puerto Rican, a Blonde, and an African woman in a taxi cab? Three people who happen to be traveling to the same location at the same point in time.

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What do you do if some idiot throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back.

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Why did the woman get into a car accident? She was blind.

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Deja moo: The feeling you've heard this bull before.

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Santa Claus is so hairy he need to shave more often.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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