When life gives you lemons Unless it gives you sugar, water, and a cup your lemonade will suck

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why is Stevie Wonder always so happy? Probably becuase he's a highly succesfull multi-million dollor recording artist with 26 grammys and 1 oscar

thumb_up thumb_down +9

why did victor have a tube on his neck he was helping james with security

thumb_up thumb_down +9

We decided to post a joke on anti-joke and see if we can get any rapings

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's as hard as a rock? A rock

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Two boys go down stairs on christmas day. They fall and die.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the black guy get a boner? The nitric oxide levels in his trabecular arteries and smooth muscle of his penis rose, causing his arteries to dilate and therefore enlarging his penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q: What's worse than your parents dying in a car crash? A: You were in the backseat and saw your mother plead your father to slit her throat witht he broken glass because her legs were brushed and a windshield wiper was shoved in her kidney. As you stared on in pure horror, your father did as she asked with much contemplation. An ambulance arrives moments later. In the hospital, you tell your dad that you hate him for killing mom. You run away and he dies overnight due to heart failure. Yo suffered paralysis and now and are confined to a wheelchair for the rest of your natural life and are sent away to a born-again foster care home where you are never adopted.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why didn't Johnny have any food left? Because he ate it all.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did Justin Bieber jump out of the airplane? He didn't, i pushed him

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did Elmer Fudd say when Bugs Bunny got away again? "Oh, dat dawn wabbit, I'ww get it some day".

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the man trip over the kitten? He was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the black man go to the back of the bus? The only unoccupied seats were back there.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. One to screw in the light bulb and one to suck my dick.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How does it change many dyslexics to take a lightbulb

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How did the black man burn down the house. He threw a flaming match through the window.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

why is six afraid of seven? because seven is black

thumb_up thumb_down +7

whatt dont w do you call a person with legs that dont work Crippled

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Enough with the gay jokes, they all go one direction.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

what's the difference between a pound of liver and vomit? £3.24

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Yar! What be a pirate's favorite football team? The Steelers. I'm originally from Pittsburgh.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's the difference between a duck and a bicycle? They both have handlebars. Except for the duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops