Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: Green paint.

What's a pirate's favorite video game? Pirates lived in a time before such technology existed

Why was the man arrested? He assaulted and raped an elderly woman at the local Walmart. He then proceeded to hijack the poor woman's Scooter and lead police on a 4 mile long car chase.

a jew, a gay, and an irishman walk int a bar at different times during the span of 5 hours.

Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

What did the kitty say when it's owner called him over? Nothing. It's owner killed him.

Daughter: Dad I have some news for you Dad: What is it? Daughter: I am pregnant Dad: ... I am so happy I am going to have a grandson, my 27 year old daughter just married and now pregnant, this is a great day!

What's the difference between a Jew and a boy scout? The boy scout comes home from camp

Because the tractor hadn't seen the chicken.

what did the guy say when he lost his sandwich? wheres my sandwich?

Why did the chicken croos the road? It didnt, my father caught him and cooked him for dinner.

what do you call a girl with a pumpkin spice coffee in her hands? Jenifer

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what did the duck say to the monkey.............. QUACK!!!!!!!!

How many asian children does it take for Gary Glitter to get aroused? Just one.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He never did because he's in KFC

What's brown and sticky? "A stick?" No, poo.

Why do you call a person who spits in your cheeseburger? A mean person

How did the boy fall off the swing? He got hit by a fridge

"bluar blah blah blarRR/ the stupid pointless part" dead people/ animals/ objects can't talk/ drive/ operate compueter, lol I'm so focken funni

why was the boy sad? because his mom just punched his hamburger

A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

A man walks into a bar and orders a strong drink Bartender: Why the long face Man: My wife was recently killed in a horrible car accident Bartender: Oh my god, I'm so sorry Man: Jks I have AIDS

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have fetal alcohol syndrome."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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