what worse than bitting into an apple and finding a worm bitting into a worm and finding an apple

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So I have an idea that will solve both world population and hunger problems! I call it the Omni-Abortion law. The idea is that all babies must be aborted and then eaten. Progressive, right?

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a blind man walks down the street and trips on an unsuspecting curb he scraped his knee

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What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

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What's the best example of an anti-joke? This one.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

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Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

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Kid A:We're home alone, you know what that means. Kid B:Cover ourselves in vaseline and slide around like slugs on the kitchen floor? Kid A:Yes

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What is big white and will kill you if it falls out of a tree in winter A refrigerator

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Why did i get some thing to eat? Because i was hungry.

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Q: How many Babies does it take to paint a garage? A: babies do not have good motor skills therefore, they can not hold a paint brush.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Bend Over.

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My mom was telling my brother how much it hurt when she stubbed her toe. He told her she should try child birth.

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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A man and a bird are on the edge of a cliff. The man falls off and dies and the bird flies away because birds can fly and people can't.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You would too if your name was Gnrwhaf

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What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

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Ok so im on antijoke.com and they tell me i can write my own joke... so i did.

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Why did the little boy cross the road? He didnt, he got hit by a car and died

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A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

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Exercise Ex - Er - Cise Ex - Ar - Size.. Eggs Are Sides For bacon.. BACON

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Why was Cinderella so bad at ball? Isn't that sexist, making assumptions about Cinderella's sports capability when you have never seen her play sports before (because she is a fictional character) and then asking why this is true when you have no proof that it is in fact true? But I would guess the correct answer is (if she is bad at ball in the first place) that she never played ball before. Think about it. Why did you have to ask this question at all? Isn't it obvious?

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We could have had it all Rolling in the deep You have my heart inside of your hand As you've just now inexplicably ripped it out of my ribcage.

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What did Batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile Get in the batmobile

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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