How long does it take for light to travel a light-year ? A year.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's black and white and red all over? I don't know either.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did Anti-Joke.com close down? It didn't. If your reading this, the site is fully operational and up to date with your system.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

I am pleased and honored to hear you speak that beautifully straight from your heart Nero, you are without equal, unmatched. And he who is unmatched, also stands alone.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

2 mentally, unstable , woman visit the cinema , and watched "The Sweeney,"they really enjoyed it

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Hollywood presents: In a world... Where darkness and crime is at every corner... The governments darkest secret... MUST... BE... UNLEASHED! Jack Kirby: So, with this technology I can swallow criminals and gain their abilities? But is there not a lot wrong with this? Hollywood: Meh... Sorry, we are gonna go with The Fast and The Furious 64: Mario Kart style.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why was billy bad at telling jokes? Billy was sexually abused as a child and humour was never really part of his life

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you get when you mix a polar bear and a dog? A dead dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Yo momma so fat she saw a yellow bus full of white kids and said, "STOP THAT TWINKIE!!"

thumb_up thumb_down -3

If a tree falls in the woods, how many animals lost their home to deforestation?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

An Irish man walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and notices he has a steering wheel stuck down the front of his pants. "Hey," he says, "What's with the steering wheel down your pants?" The Irish man looks down at it, dumbfounded. "I have absolutely no idea," he says, and removes it.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A man was arguing with his wife over the phone at a trainstation. She threatened to leave him he did not stop his physical abuse. The man became so mad he hung up the phone. He then noticed a blind man was grinning at the overheard discussion. The husband walked over and pushed the blind man on the tracks. He died

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

The Grinch stole Christmas, he accidentally dropped it and Christmas was ruined for everyone life sucked -shane,Adam,David and Riley go cry about it

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock Knock. Erm, sorry to be weird, but can you perhaps use the doorbell, because it's new and has a novelty chime. I'm proud of it and get a little chuckle everytime it rings in the vain hope that, perhaps you, the visitor, may also find it entertaining. Who's there anyway?'

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well I'll tell you. He was happily gliding down the sidewalk when he realized that his destination was across the road. He then proceeds to take In his surroundings . He finds that there is no indication telling him to stop so he then cautiously walks across the road watching for any dangerous movement. He safely makes it across and proceeds to his destination which is the slaughtering house. He is a retarded chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q. What's long and hard and full of seamen? A. A penis. Oops, I misspelled "semen". Sorry. Also, to clarify, this doesn't describe the normal state of the average penis. Usually they are flaccid, and they can only be said to be "full of semen" at the exact moment of ejaculation.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the guy say to helen keller nothing... according to helen keller

thumb_up thumb_down -3

roses are red violets are blue show me your bed i wanna fuck you oh and roses are red violets are blue nice tits.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He than orders some drinks.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Fact: When you die, you can't eat ice cream!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What happens when you run over a black man? It is most likely that he is killed.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: what did the man with no eyes get for Chrismas? A: Reading glasses

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops