How do you make a baby stop crying?you scream at it and throw it at wall

I'm so punny.

What did the platypus do whenever he walked into the bar? Nothing. It's a platypus, they don't do much.

"hey do you know the date" "58"

Q:Why couldn't the man lick his ice cream? A: Because he lost all of his tongue due to the chemicals of cigarettes.

Your mom is so ugly- Wait, hold on. How are you born?

Mom now that I am fourteen can I get a bra now? No Harold!

womens rights.

Yo momma so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning.

I like my babies how I like my chips. Chopped up and in a bag.

Little Johnny was walking through the park... only he had no legs. Little Johnny was raped later that day... while he bled out from him having his legs cut.

There was this girl who suffered for her whole life and then she died. It was very liberating.

Why can't Hellen keller drive? Because she's a woman.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I forgot the rest, Don't laugh at me...

What did the black man say to the jew at a party Well hello i don't believe we met.

Canadians

What's worst that cancer? Murder porn

what do you call a black man, white man, mexican, irishman, indian, and chinese man being hung at the same time? -a racially diverse pirate crew

It's weird how two of the SAME jokes can get different ratings.

why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being chased by 7, who is a rapist

Ask me if im a truck are you a truck no

What's better then one dead baby in a tub? Many things a dead baby is a tragedy.

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He than orders some drinks.

Hey you must be a parking ticket, because your yellow.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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