What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are the same.

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Q: What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? A: "Here come the elephants over the hill!"

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A girl walked into a bar and sat next to a man. She asked what he was drinking. He said something that makes you fly. She didn't believe him. He then went up to the roof, jumped off and walked back in the front door. She got the drink then tried to jump off the roof, and died on impact. The bartender said to the man "You're a real asshole when you're drunk superman."

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Whats brown and smells bad poo

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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A woman walked into a bar. She dragged her drunk husband off his stool and left.

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Why was the boy sad The boy wanted a puppy for his Birthday So his parents got him a Toy dog Later that year he was found dead with the Toy Dog shoved down his mouth gagging him.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? No. Oh don't worry then.

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What did the no-arm, no-leg, paraplegic orphan with cancer get for christmas? Pregnant.

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asians have slitted eyes lol

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Q: How many electricians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: 1, idiot.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Sandwich.

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Why didn't the boy want to go to school? Because it was 3am.

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Q: What do you get when you mix root beer with a cloud? A: Nothing, you idiot.

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Why does the fat kid no longer have friends? He died after falling out of a tree.

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What did the one midget say to the other midget? We r both small

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What did Sammy get for Christmas? Raped.

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What did the leper say to the prostitute? "How much?! No thanks, I think I'll shop around."

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whats fat round and mentally special? PeterPanMyHero!

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why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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Roses r Red Violets r Blue I'm schizophrenic So am i too!

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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the mean terrorist said "i am going to kill your mother" that mother is now dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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