95556

Hey I just meet you. And this is crazy, but im a Zombie. And you looks tasty!

I like my coffe like my women Without a Penis

How Dow you make a baby stop crying?? Hit it with a brick By smash45

How many Dean Mckee's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He doesn't know what a lightbulb's for, nevermind how to use one.

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, because they weren't made. Cupcakes were made instead. Sorry, Muffins.

how does chuck norris eat an apple Just like every other person

What do you call it when a multiple personality disorder person masturbates? Rape.

At the Asthma hotline. Caller: Aahhh aahhh *gasp* *gasp* I need you... Woman: *slams phone* DAMN I WISH THESE PERVERTS WOULD STOP CALLING!

Pikachu says "Pikachu!" Squirtle says "Squirtle!" Charmander says "Charmander!" Ash is upset because he cannot communicate with his Pokemon in their foreign tongue.

Why did Sarah fall of the swing? Because she was very careless and swung too high.

Why was the new born on the orphanage's doorstep? He was an accident.

If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running away from a Black family reunion.

Why does the man have mayonaise in his pants? A: I don't know, I was hoping you could tell me.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

What's worse than losing your job? Getting repeatedly hit in the face with a brick after getting fired from your job.

Why was Johnny sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

What do you call a alcaholic walking down the street..... Roadkill

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because death was certain if it didn't.

what do you call a ginger......... billy and mickee.......

U are with a jew a Christian and a muslim, you walk in chicken shop, thw lights close, and all of a sudden, hitler and a vampire pop up. Which one do you kill? The jew.

Two men walked into a bar. Only one came out. What happened? One Passed out.

What did they do with the drunken sailor? Gave him the sack, which meant he could no longer provide for his family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...