Roses are red, Violets are blue, Haiku doesn't rhyme, And neither does this

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Why was the chubby bird that you were staring at you angry. Because you were looking at him.

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I got a boner from the waitress touching my shoulder, please dislike this

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Just want to know where I will be dipping my... MANFLESH!

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What did the boy with cancer get for his birthday? Roses on his tombstone.

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A Jew and a Neo-Nazi meet in a bar. They put aside their differences and enjoy a few rounds of drinks.

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What did the blonde say when she was asked what color her hair was ? Blonde.

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What's worse than seeing your grandfather dead on the floor? Seeing your grandmother standing over him with a knife

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When did the laughter finally die? When you started this joke.

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How do you kill Osama Bin Laden? Get The Navy Seals To Infiltrate his compound.

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Justin Bieber.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall?? A: It depends on how hard you throw them!!

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how long does it take chuck norris to watch a 24 hour video 24 hours

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Why bouriquet fall off the swing? Ask him.

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What happens to a blonde girl who is buying drugs off of a drug dealer? Nothing, she was an undercover police officer trying to arrest said drug dealers on the street.

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It was okay, then Alice my friend and a nurse insisted (she can be a total bitch) I take a painkiller, of course that messed up my focus completely and threw off my hypnotic suggestion which I use to shut down the pain receptors. Ironically I cannot seem to shut off my allergy to dust. Oh, yeah it was the standard bullshit Mensa test, ten patterns or something, oh and while I am terrible at trivia, I am actually much smarter than a fifth grader, I mean one kid told me he was smarter because he could do math better than me and he could, so I choked the little bitch to death, who is the smartest one now?

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What's black on top and white on the bottom? Half an oreo

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an 80 yr old man apllies to walmart

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Two black guys walk into a bar. They had too much alcoholic substances and got alcohol poisoning. Their families mourned for days and their kids grew u without a father. The end.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. Fortunately, the bra was on display in a clothing store and was not actually being worn at the time.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen cheese

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What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

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What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer.

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Why did the Christian man dislike gays? Because Christianity views being gay as a sin, and as a follower of the religion he decided he did not like gays.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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