What did the chair say to the fan? Nothing. Chairs and fans are objects so they do not have the physical ability to talk.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender suddenly runs out the door frantically yelling, "He's got a gun! He's got a gun!" Meanwhile, inside the bar, the patrons overpowered the gunman, tied him up and took his weapon and all the cash he had. They later used his money to buy more drinks at another bar.

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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What did the white man say to the group of mexicans when a golf ball was coming toward them? 4!

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What is white, average height and cannot jump as high as a black man? A fridge.

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Why should you never push a Mexican off a bike? Because he will file a lawsuit against you in the event of an injury.

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What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

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What did the smiley face say to the other smiley face? Nothing. They just smiled.

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How many dead babies can you fit inside Casey Anthony's trunk? Trick question. She didn't do it.

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Whats the difference between a penis and a vagina? Pancakes,

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What did the hobo get for Christmas? Nothing

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What does it mean when people say your mom? it means that there name is Hunter

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A bear walks into a bar. The bear is then shot by the bartender with the shotgun kept under the counter.

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What is worse than finding dead parents? Not finding them.

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Whats worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Finding out that that apple was the tip of a dick

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A man walks into a bar and sees a depressed looking giraffe. The man says, “Why the long neck?” The giraffe responds, “That’s not the expression.”

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Knock knock who's there atch watch who? bless you

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Knock knock. Who's there? Josh. Lettuce who? I didn't say "lettuce"... I said Josh.

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Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

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Q: What's red and bad for your teeth? A: Bricks.

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How do you circumcise a cat? Shoot an orphan in the leg with a rail gun.

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How can you tell the difference between a black guy and a white guy? skin color

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What did the cat say to the rabbit? Nothing, cats are incapable of human speech as far as scientists are concerned. Also, the mouse was having a bad day. Rutabaga.

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A Jew, Muslim and Mexican all die of cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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