Sarah Jessica Parker

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A: Ask me if I'm a tree! B: Okay, are you a tree? A: No, no I am not.

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Whats worse than the death of a celebrity? An anonymous person posting a joke on this site.

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Why was 9 afraid of 10 because 10 was a registered sex offender

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whats worse than being raped by a giant scorpion getting raped by 2 giant scorpions

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this is not a drill.

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What do you call a bird that can't fly? an ostrich

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What did one orphan say to the other? 'Robin get in the car!'

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock Whose there? Obviously not Suzie.

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Knock Knock who's there its black george washington.

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A man found out that he had hit the lottery and would be receiving 300 million dollars, but he had to fly to china to do so. The man took a plane to China from New York and would arrive within the next several hours. Meanwhile, in australia a god-cow was producing infinitely large amounts of concentrated milk. His milk was so infinitely large in mass that it collapsed on its own mass and turned into black hole; absorbing the entire Earth. The man never got to receive his money from winning the lottery

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One.

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What's sadder than a lost puppy? A dead puppy.

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What do you call a building full of Mexicans? JAIL.

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A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

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What did the doctor say to the actor? Your an actor.

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what is worse than a hole in your sock? Getting raped

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Dad, if I say shit or somethin... Dad: FALCOWN PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANCH!

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Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor ? A: The holocaust

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Two men walk into a bar, one ducks

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why is my phone broken i dropped it

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What's the worst way to say you want to break up? Kill her dog.

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What's worse than a dead baby? A dumpster full of dead babies What's worse than that? One is still alive at the bottom What's worse than that? It had to eat its way out. What's worse than that? It came back for seconds

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Why was the woman in the kitchen? She came in to give her husband, who was washing the dishes, a kiss before she went to bed early so she could be well rested and get up on time to make the 45 minute commute to the hospital where she worked as a neurosurgeon the next morning.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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