Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

why barack obama sad he realized the 4 trillion dollars of debt wasn't going be solved by borrowing more money

Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, most likely nobody

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. He had multiple MRI's and bodily fluid tests to confirm the diagnosis. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, As you can tell...a lot of blood has been spilt today.

Knock Knock Who's there? Tank tank who? You're welcome

Roses are red violets are blue I'm gonna rape you with a stick

A wanted man walks into a bar. The police come and take him to jail.

These jokes don't have punchlines.

What happened to the boy with no family? He died in a tragic car accident along with his family

An alligator walks into a bar. The bar tender calls animal control and calmly escorts everyone out the back door.

Doctor! doctor! I feel like a bridge! That's the least of your problems you've got cancer by ndc

What's funnier than 1 anti- joke? Two anti- jokes.

A black man walks into a KFC, he then realizes that he is in the wrong store, and walks out.

Two gay guys are cuddling in a park when they spot a hot, busty blonde jogging near them. One turns to the other and says, "Damn... It's days like this I wish I was a lesbian."

Q: What is brown and sticky and often found in the grass? A: A stick.

A man walks into a bar. He is rushed to the hospital and has his wounds treated.

Variants: :) I will always assist you in whatever you want. :( I want to kill you all by myself! Sense? Non? Fuck? Mind? Fission Mailed? Impossible Mission.

Why did the mouse cross the road? Because he had been attached to the chicken with a nail gun.

What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

What did Jesus say to the jews? Fuck you.

What do you tell your chicken when it is it's birthday. Nothing, because he wouldn't understand you.

How do you find your way out of the impossible maze? You don't.

Knock Knock. Who's there? It's the nazis we have reason to suspect that you are harboring illegal jewish fugitives and would like to check your house if it isn't too much trouble on your part.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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