Oh my God! A talking dog!

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, I'm blind.

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Why did the monkey eat the banana? Because it was sexually confused

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How did Hitler fit 100 jews in his car? He didn't, he was too busy killing them in concentration camps.

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Twilight is so bad, I read it and personally didn't like it as a book.

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A white man is running away from a black man. Because they are Playing tag. A gaming involving to touch the other person

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Whats better than seeing a worm in your apple... Reading the the next anti-joke.

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what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? It got shot Why did the 2nd monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey

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A woman walks in a confessional booth and proceeds to tell the priest about how she killed and ate her baby in a fit of hysteria because she is having issues dealing with her fresh divorce. The priest does not call 911.

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't eat your friends Nose it is!

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What happened to the boy who ate a piece of his Halloween candy? He died. It was laced with cyanide.

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Why do elephant tusks stick out? For uprooting trees and bushes, and for defending their young.

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What do u do when u hear about a smart Blonde. Cant think of anything? Exactly

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You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you can't divide by zero.

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

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I wondered why the piano was getting bigger. Then it hit me... I'm sorry I have visual agnosia

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How did the black man burn down the house. He threw a flaming match through the window.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for his birthday? A bike

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy launched a flare. Nobody came.

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Why did the kid lose his nose? because his brother chopped it off with an axe.

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What can I say, besides, the media is fighting one another now, people do have more freedom, religion is losing the grip on people, and yeah the world may be a bit grim right now, but people have chosen their own direction in life, and that is going wherever the most corrupt ones in society tell them to. And that was never different, I am not saying that you are not doing a good job, I am saying that the underground society failed, we where idealists, then we where branded criminals, without a shred of proof, I have not lost myself, and you have not lost you, why save the rest from what they enjoy?

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April showers bring... tornadoes that kill families

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What do you call a group of Mexicans jumping over a fence? I heat of runners trying out for the Mexican Olympic hurdle team.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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