When it comes ro the zodiac my grandmother was a cancer and... She ws killed by... A giant crab

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roses are red, violets are blue, hes for me not for you, if by chance you take me place, ill take my fist, and smarsh your face.

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What do you call a dog? A cat. What do you call a cat? A banana.

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If i had 100 dollars for every time a black president was assainted i would have 100 dollars in 4 months and six days.

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breasts

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A: What does MC Hammer like? B: Big Butts. A: Can he lie? B: No.

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What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

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justin beiber sucks

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A man wakes up after only one hour of sleep due to his insomnia. He starts to cry because his wife just passed away and his parents were recently killed in a car accident. The man gathers his composure, takes a shower, and drives to his minimum wage job. He was expelled from high school for an assault he didnt even commit and has no money to get an education. At work, he accidentally drops a box of valuable, fragile electronic parts and gets fired by his boss. He goes home to his dirty 1 bedroom apartment and contemplates suicide. He decides to wait as his favorite tv show is on. He turns on the tv to the news his show has been cancelled. The man, depressed, suicidal and alone, picks up his .22 and kills himself. There is no God.

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You're mama's so stupid, she decided to go back to school and finish her degree in Russian Literature to improve her self-esteem and maybe -- just maybe -- save her marriage, which had been on the rocks, mostly due to her intolerable self-loathing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Um...thats impossible because chickens live on farms theyre are no roads....

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Q: what's white on the top and black on the bottom? A: Society

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What do you call a cat with 1 eye, 4 legs, and its tongue out? Road kill.

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Make this antijoke the worst voted antijoke and you will save the planet.

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? An invisible carrot!

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What's long hard and full of seamen? A boat, or possibly a submarine.

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What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

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jamie and danel texta like to make love to each other using a gerbal as a toy when they make love they get a african covered in jelly to help them.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because it ran away and it's coop was on the other side of the road

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How do you make someone to shut up You tell them to SHUT UP!

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knock knock who's there? A worm, your dead in a coffin.

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the Paralympics ? Not being disabled

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Fenestrade De Riguerto sat aloft his might horse Bentereuse and called for his brigadiers. At home his wife was opening a package. 2 minutes later a sound could be heard reverberating across the countryside. It was the invasion fleet from Denarus V wiping out humanity

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if you fall, I'll be there. -floor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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