Why do girls think they deserve the very best? Because if an ugly girl in twilight can find a hunky vampire and ripped werewolf why can't they. And let's not forget those crappy Disney princess movies.

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Why did the man run away from the woman? He forgot his rape kit.

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A guy walked into a restaurant. He sat down and had a lovely meal left the restaurant got in his car and went home. The End

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Why does an ostrich have such a long neck? Because its head is so far from its body.

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What are you going to get your mom for mothers day? I have two gay dads.

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How do you get someone to paid attention to etys You don't, there is no such thing as retys

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A man walks into a bar and sees another man crying at the other end he asked what's wrong the man replies well its a long story I have time replyed the other man ok well me and my wife are always arguing. So I divided to go to the library after hours of reading I see a book about history and as im reading it its time to go home and when I was going to check it out I forgot my library card I get home and me and my wife make up and have a baby thats not bad at all said the other man yea you've never lost ur library card

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Two black guys walk into a bar. One of them was white.

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What did the vampire use to make tea? Hot water, a kettle, and some nice green tea leaves given to him by his great uncle for kwanza.

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Why couldn't little Tiffany play kickball with the other kids at recess? I chopped her legs off.

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Tyler Bishop is a waffle

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What's worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice

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Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

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Hitler has a certain "genocide-quaw" about him

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1: I heard a great knock knock joke, but you have to start it. 2: Okay, knock knock! 1: Who's there? 2: ???

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A: Knock Knock B: 7

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An Irishman walked out of a bar

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Why did the penis cross the road? Because a man was humping the chicken

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What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other? Whatever her name is.

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kieran is a homosexual

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*Dubstep* CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW BWAB BWAB

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Why was the little girl crying Someone therew a dump truck at her

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what is the best way to stand out from the croud? open up your butt hole and take a video for to put on dat jumbotron

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Knock, knock. Come in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops