What's green and hangs from trees? Leafs

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Why is Michael Jackson a bad chess player? Because he's dead.

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Q: How many lightbulbs does it take to screw in a dog house, if your parents are a washing machine and a dryer? A: Trick Question, dog houses can't fly!

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What's big, yellow and if it fell from a tree it would kill you? A JCB!

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Q: What did the bulbasaur say to the charmanderr?? A: bulbasaurrr

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What do you do when life throws lemons at you? Take out your lemon shield and retreat deep into your lemon proof bunker.

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Whats on my leg? A pimple. What is it doing? Releasing a white/clear puss.

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Q:Why did sarah fall off the swing? A:She had no arms. 1:Knock knock 2:who's there? 1:not sarah

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Hitler: A jew walked into a bar... jokes, it was a gas chamber

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What's the easiest way to become filthy rich? There are many ways to earn money. Invest some time into researching the topic.

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I think my son might be gay. He's started to listen to Justin Bieber, and last week I walked in on him engaging in penetrative anal sex with one of his friends.

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Brother: Where is my Guitar? Me: To the Left to The left Brother : No its not Me: Everything you own in the box to the to the left Brother : Im telling Mom Me: In the Closet Thats my stuff and if i bought please don't touch Brother: *Opens Closet* This is all Mine! Me: *Takes off headphones*? Huh? Brother: Nevermind - _ -

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Why is it good to date twenty eight year olds? Because there is twenty of them.

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Why did sally fall of of the swing she had no arms

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Shah I'm being chased by a man riding instead a pig in a caravan smoking Apparently I'm a man riding on a pig in a caravan smoking

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A Christian and an atheist are in a bar. Neither one knows the other's religion and they continue to drink.

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What is long, hard, and full of seamen A submarine you pervert

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? This joke.

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What's your favorite Sylvia Plath quote? "Turn on the oven."

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Have you seen Hellen Keller's dad? Neither did she

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Q: Whats blue and white and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A: A tree wearing a denim jacket.

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy but your adopted banana

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor. wheres my tractor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops