Whet doesn't kill you, probably will next time.

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An Asian walks into a bar with his girlfriend He proceeds to buy himself and her food Pays Then leaves

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whats a joke

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which is faster a) ferrari b) beetle a ferrari

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Why was OJ Simpson's knife covered in blood? Because he just murdered his wife.

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No your aunties a joke

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What's worse than Monkey Ball? Super Monkey Ball. What's worse than Super Monkey Ball? The Holocaust.

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did you see stevie wonder's new guitar no neither did he

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Why isn't eating an Olympic sport? Because that wouldn't make any sense.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Why didn't Santa deliver presents until the night after Christmas? You should go ask someone who knows.

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Fetus Blood. Due to the low concentration of iron, it gives it an aroma of paint.

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why did marybeth fall off the swing i shot her in the fart box and she died

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Whats long, green and falls out of trees? A canoe. Why did the old man fall out of the tree? He was in the canoe.

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Q. Why do some people not like anti-jokes? A. They don't find the humor funny.

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Why did the Jew lock the chest? Because that's where he was hiding the body.

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Did you hear about the Polish couple taking selfies while on vacation in Portugal? They fell off a cliff and died in front of their children. True story.

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What looks like a horse, but smells and has feathers? A dead horse with a pidgeon in its ass.

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8

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What did the doctor say to the seriously ill patient? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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Q:What happened after the snake tricked Adam and Eve into eating fruit from the tree of wisdom? A: Nothing, but the three of knowledge was a whole other story though. Moral Man.

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How do you make an idiot in suspense?

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Why was Jimmy sad he couldn't play the Playstation? He didnt have one

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What do you call a midget mixed with a T. rex? Dinosaurs are dead and this is a highly un probable situation. Therefore, I do not know.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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