"Torture the orphans as much as you want. Who they gonna tell? Their parents?"

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your skull would make a nice pen holder

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What's straight and famous. Ryan Secrest I was just kidding about the stright

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What did God say when he made his first black guy? Oh no I burned one! :)

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what's a snake that has no legs a snake

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What is worst than Justin Bieber new album? Being a jew during the holocaust or aids.

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What has two legs and oinks? Half a pig.

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A blonde keeps walking down her driveway to her mailbox.Finally, her neighbor asks, "Why?" The blonde replies, "The computer says I've got mail."

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You're rowing a canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a dog house? None because icecream doesn't have bones.

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how many licks does it take to get to the center of lollipop? unknown.

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Knock Knock Who's There The police, your under arrest.

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What did one liar say to the other liar? I'm very honest.

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Roses are red and i like Pie but seriously, i don't care if you die

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roses are red, violets are blue, poems are stupid, refridgerator

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A priest, a rabbi and a proctologist walk into a bar. Why is there a bar lying in the middle of the sidewalk?

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se* is like math add the couple minus the clothes add the cream and just hope they dont multiply

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Your moms so fat she struggles to to everyday tasks

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1,2,3,4,5..what comes next? yeah you should know how to count

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Attack her with a sanding machine.

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What's the difference between a duck and a bicycle? They both have handlebars. Except for the duck.

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Why did the asian lady buy the large shirt instead of the medium? Because the medium didn't fit

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A shoemaker walks into a bar holding a shoebox with only one shoe inside. The bartender gives him a drink and asks "Say mister, why are you carrying that shoebox with one shoe?" The shoemaker says "Well sir, it's a long story." The bartender says "Okay, give me the short version." The shoemaker says "Okay, long story short, I'm not really a shoemaker." The bartender asks "Well buddy, what are ya?" The shoemaker gets up from his chair and says "I'm a guy missing shoe."

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guess what? bannanas

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Why did the woman make the man a sandwich? Because the man severed his spinal cord and is no longer able to move any of his limbs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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