One sunny Tuesday morning, Tom and his friends were outside playing at the park. Then, suddenly, a violent storm was rapidly approaching. It was recommended that everyone should seek shelter immediately.

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what do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? a stick

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Your flying on a canoe, and one of the wheels breaks off. How many pancakes does it take to fix it? Trick question there is a gorilla on board.

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what doesn't kill you makes you crippled for life because you lost use of your legs in a tragic car accident

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A man wakes up after only one hour of sleep due to his insomnia. He starts to cry because his wife just passed away and his parents were recently killed in a car accident. The man gathers his composure, takes a shower, and drives to his minimum wage job. He was expelled from high school for an assault he didnt even commit and has no money to get an education. At work, he accidentally drops a box of valuable, fragile electronic parts and gets fired by his boss. He goes home to his dirty 1 bedroom apartment and contemplates suicide. He decides to wait as his favorite tv show is on. He turns on the tv to the news his show has been cancelled. The man, depressed, suicidal and alone, picks up his .22 and kills himself. There is no God.

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roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

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Hurr durr, I shit my pants.

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Why didn't the man give a location of the murderer? He was murdered

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- Knock, knock. -- How many dead babies does it take to cross the street and walk into a bar? - That's an odd question to ask to a visitor. -- Your mom.

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Whats worse than failing an English test? finding out your now exgirlfriend has aids.

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What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table isn't a whore.

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Friend: Dude are you going to see the hunger games? Me: But i alreay seen it Friend: Dafuq? its not even out yet. Me: African children invented the hunger games. Friend: -.-

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What do you call a bunch of white men sitting on a bench? The NBA.

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Why do people make fun of Laquesha? Because she's white.

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what happens when you step on a bear trap? Alot of pain.

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who is the shortest man in the world? ADITYA DEV

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what do you call an octopus with 9 tentacles? a male octopus

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What did the man say to the other man? I have a large rod

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What did Santa say when he fell down? Ouch

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What was the black guy doing in Mississippi? Just hanging around.

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What was the racist kid's least favorite ice cream flavor? Chocolate for an unrelated reason.

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Fenestrade De Riguerto sat aloft his might horse Bentereuse and called for his brigadiers. At home his wife was opening a package. 2 minutes later a sound could be heard reverberating across the countryside. It was the invasion fleet from Denarus V wiping out humanity

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The Below statement is an antijoke. The Above statement is a joke.

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roses are red, no one gives a shit, get back in the kitchen and bring me my chicken dips!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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