you are as stupid as alec. lol neewb

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I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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Q. What has 5 chins, 10 eyes, 10 feet, and 50 fingers? A. Five People.

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What goes round and knocks on windows? A paedophile.

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Have you heard about the constipated mathematician? He worked his problems out with a pencil... It was a #2 pencil

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A homophobic man walks into a bar and the bartender asks: "what can I get for ya?" the man replies: "shut up gaylord"

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Why was the little girl sad? She had a grown man sexually assault her.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

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whats the difference between this joke and other jokes other jokes have a punch line

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red is black green is black i'm batman i'm white,

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What do you call a black man that can steal, shoot, and jump? A basketball player.

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What is the difference between a boyscout and a Jew? Boys outs come home from camp.

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Why did the dog run away from home? Because the owner left the door open.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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how do goldfishes drown? you pull them backward water fills there lung and there die

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Why did the helicopter crash? Because the driver was fat.

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How did the seal die? It went clubbing ... Then overdosed on ecstasy, it was very sad.

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At the Asthma hotline. Caller: Aahhh aahhh *gasp* *gasp* I need you... Woman: *slams phone* DAMN I WISH THESE PERVERTS WOULD STOP CALLING!

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how does chuck norris eat an apple Just like every other person

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A man walks into the bar. It was typical day and nothing interesting happened.

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Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

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What did the boyfriend ask his girlfriend for on his birthday? Pokemon Yellow version.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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knock knock. who's there? your neighbor. o hi come one in!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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