Your mamma used to be fat till Slim Fast came out with dick flavor!

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In a tangential universe Crispin Glover is the head of scientology

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What did the viking say to the alien? "Vad i namn av valhalla är en utlänning gör här?"

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why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

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whats funny about the klu klux klan? nothing is funny at all about it because they cause pain and suffering to afircan amaricans and other ethnic groups.

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hey guess what? what ur gay! how did you know ive been in the closet for 5 years!?

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what did batman say to robin before they got in the car? "robin get in the car"

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How did the fat man survive the plane crash? He didn't, he died like everyone else!

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Q: How do you make Kobie Bryant cry? A: Kill his family.

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What did one cat say to the other cat? --------- Meow --------- What's pink and fluffy? --------- Pink fluff --------- What's green and yellow? --------- Grass. I lied about the yellow part.

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what did the apple say to the orange? nothing, stupid, apples can't talk

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A man runs into a bar and yells "Ow!!" He is hospitalized due to severe trauma to the head and spine.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There not the girl

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Did you hear about the man who played the lottery? He lost.

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What has four legs in the morning, two legs at noon, and three legs at night? An experimental animal mutilated then exposed to radiation.

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Why did the cookie shader Because someone dropped it

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Can a match box? No, but a tin can.

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Why did the Nun refude to say Thank You Father? Because she was raped by her father as a child.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Dementia.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? A second one

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Why did the man cross the road? Because the light was red!

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women rights

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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Fact: 100% of people who drink alcohol will die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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