Wha'ts the difference between Justin Beiber and a piece of hot muff garbage? Fart triscuits.

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A blonde walks into a bar therefore her face hurts

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What's did the lizard cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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whats worse than catching your parents having sex? having sex with your parents

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A man walks into a bar and orders four shots. Before the bartender asks "If it really is that bad of a day". The man says "Yea I need this shit". The next day the bar is overwhelmed with police and investigators. The bartender had emptied a revolver in the tired business man's face and vanished.

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How do get a cat to like you? Give it lots of love and attention

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The word "Walter" is never funny.

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Q: how do you get a clown off a swing? A: You hit it with a axe

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Beacuse he got kicked out of the bar

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what would happen if every overweight person in america jumped at the same time? they would all get a little exercise.

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers but at least i do not have Alzheimers

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what did the black guy say to the white comedian? haha

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Yo mommas so fat that when people look at her they say things like "shes bigger than me"

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How did Mary fall off the swing? She got hit by a fridge.

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How many dogs does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. Dogs don't have thumbs.

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All the planets are named after gods Ours is named after dirt....

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OMG SOHPIE IS SOOOOO GREAT AT BLOWING Josh Brown xoxo

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A guy walks into a psychiatrist's office covered only in Saran Wrap. He asks the doctor, "The strip of metal teeth is missing from the box, so could I borrow your scissors?"

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What's black and white all over and has a mouth? A Zebra

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A brunette child with a blond mother is crying. Why? Because his father was just mauled by a Scandinavian dragon.

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What is Kanye West's favorite type of sea-food? Lobster Bisque with a side of french fries.

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A man walks into a bar, drinks, then leaves the bar.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being hit by a plane.

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Why was Mr. Smith always so sad at the block party? His uncle molested him as a child, when he was 10 he finally told his mother. His mother and father later fought if they should tell the police, the mother wanted him to go to jail, and the dad didn't want to ruin his family because the uncle was his brother, and the uncle had children. Right before his mother would call the police his father stabbed her in the back, mr smith saw what happened. Him and his father hid his mothers body and mr smith"s dad told him if he tells anyone about this he will kill him. Years later when mr smith was 13 he went on drugs to ease the pain, he later became an addict, and dropped out of school. He know suffers from depression and has killed all 3 of his wives. He is wanted in many middle eastern countries. So when ever he goes to sleep he has the same dream were him mom offers him pot and right before he gets it his dad stabs her in the back. So know mr smith is sad at the block party because he will kill himself later tonight.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops