- Anti Joke

what did the first fire hi-grin say to the second fire hi-grin nothing they can talk it what just really awkward.

What's the difference between a trampoline and a cat? I take mu cleats off when I jump on a trampoline.

What did the lampshade say to the other lampshade? Nothing they sat in silence

Situation: 2 cows eating grass on a warm Sunday night. Question: Why does 9+4=3 1/2? Answer: 69!

knock knock "whos there ?" "the police , your husband has died" "ok"

What did one penguin-necrophiliac say to another penguin-necrophiliac? Nothing. Penguins cant talk.

Why did the girl fall off of her swing? Because she had no arms.

Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the bird.

Why did seven eat nine? Because six was afraid of him.

How do you get the pesky neighborhood kids off your front lawn? Molest them.

a man decided to climb a tree. he got to the top,raised his arms above his head and said "I am on top of the world ". after that he fell because he was not holding on to anything

What's special about an Irish Parachute ? It's made in Ireland.

what do you get when you combine sodium and hydroxide? sodium-hydroxide

Is it a ironic if a man with ADD is driving a Ford Focus?

"So, what do you fancy doing tonight?" "Does it matter? We'll end up doing what you want anyway..."

What is worse than a dog bite? A shark bite.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

What did Chuck Testa do when he saw she had died of a heart attack? He cried and gave her a proper funeral and burial.

In soviet Russia, your dead because it doesn't exist anymore

Knock knock. Who's there? IRS. Youre being audited, Sir.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a bus on the way over.

what happened to the man that no one cares about? No one cares

How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just two, the mystery is how mice can get inside a lightbulb.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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