What did Tiger Woods say when his wife hit him with a golf club? "Why did you hit me with a golf club".

would you rather harry styles my dick have harry styles suck my dick or both of you style on my harry dick?

why is stu taking so long to post a joke because he is autistic

Subject A: Knock Knock! Subject B: *silence* Subsequently, Subject A dejectedly walks home and hangs himself.

What do you want to be when you grow up? I want to be a .... The boy didn't finish his sentence because he got hit by a fridge.

Why did the ground beef taste funny? Because little Timmy fell in the grinder.

The duck walked up to the lemonade stand and he said to the man who was running the stand, hey I cancer CC

what did the murderer say when he lost his gun? dangit. now i cant kill anyone

can you pass the soap?

When would you find a Mexican, Asian, Black and white guy hanging out? Never

A man walks into a bar and is shot in the face

why did the bear cross the road? to get cream cheese.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because skeletons don't get invited to parties because they are the remains of something that is dead and that would be a very ood thing to have at a party.

-Why was little Johnny sad? >Why? -Because he had a frog stapled to his forehead.

Your momma is so fat that she's developed a cardiovascular disease and has 5 weeks to live

What goes from pink to red in 5 seconds? A pink shirt when red pain is spilled on it.

Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

A black guy, a white guy, a Jew, and a priest are on plane that is on fire. What do they do? Call their family and tell them they lovedthem, because there are more than likely going to die.

Once there was a dog, another one came to it and then there were two.

Why did the Mexican sneak across the US border? There aren't many good jobs for him in Mexico, and with the low cost of living in his small village, he will be able to provide for his entire family of seven on just minimum wage in California. He will miss his family terribly while he is away from them, but he believes it is worth it in the end. Once he saves enough, he will pay the coyotes to smuggle the rest of his family over so they can be together again. Hopefully none of them will die on the journey.

This one time at Concentration camp.... My friends all died cause they were chosem in the Selection

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

What's worse than the Holocaust? Getting raped..

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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