How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

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Two muffins are in an oven. They say absolutely nothing because they're muffins and not sentient.

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why did the man beat his wife? why not?

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Why is this website called anti-jokes? i don't know but it makes sense.

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Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

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How do you fit 100 dead babies in a box? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla Chips. hehehehehehe

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 raped 9.

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What is the difference between a black man and a piece of fried chicken? Fried chicken is a breaded meal that is high in calories whereas a black man is an unedible human being with feelings.

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What did the farmer say to the cow that asked for food? No.

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How did the chicken cross the road? Assuming the vehicles yielded to the chicken, it looked both directions before crossing then proceded across the street while staying between the crosswalk lines until it had reached the other side of the road.

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A man agreed with a camel. The camel didn't agree. ... (This joke does only make sense in the Dutch language.)

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A Redhead, a Blonde, and a Brunette are all standing on top of a cliff in Ireland. They took a few pictures, and all in all it was a lovely vacation.

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What do you get when you come across a duck and a moose? Nothing...What do you think you deserve a prize or something?

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What's the difference between being hungry and being horny? Where you put the cucumber

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite

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Why do giraffes have long necks? To connect their bodies to their heads.

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If life gives you lemons, You throw them as hard as you can at the nearest stranger. If life gives you melons, You're probably dyslexic.

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I was there when Lebron James hit a home run to win the Super Bowl.

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Why does the black man take drugs. Because he is very sick.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

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Stop reading these anti-jokes and go study for your externals!

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What did little Timmy get for Christmas after he was diagnosed with leukemia? A gift card to Bed Bath and Beyond because he was interested in redecorating.

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What's worse than breaking a leg? Breaking two legs.

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Q: why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: He had no arms Q: Why couldn't he get up? A: He died when he hit the ground

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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