what's the difference between your grandmother and a dead squirrel? Technically, if you burn them both, your grandmother will produce more ash, but apart from that, they are both useless pieces of carbon.

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Knock Knock Who's There Nobody Nobody Who?

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What's the difference between Newt Gingrich's cat and a hand grenade? Gingrich's cat is a domesticated quadriped mammal, a hand grenade is a small bomb that can be thrown by hand

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One time I said to my friend, "There are too many black people in this country." I forgot he was black.

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What did the talking muffin say to the other talking muffin? Ah! A talking muffin!

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No

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knock knock. whos there? the IRS you have recently filed for bankruptcy and we are repossessing your house.

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Yo momma so fat, she was recently diagnosed with type 2 diabetes and is at great risk for developing heart disease!

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what is the difference between oral and anal? anal makes your day and anal makes your whole weak

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Yo mama so fat, she suffered a heart attack last week and we are all deeply concerned.

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My name's Forrest Gump. People call me Forrest Gump.

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Why did the chicken cross the road. To get to the other side. Original anti joke.

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he has a great career and a loving family.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Tourette's, Cheese on toast.

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WHATS BROWN AND SMELLS LIKE CRAP!?!?!?!?!?!?!? crap

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A man approaches an attractive young woman at a party. He asks her if a rag smells like chloroform and proceeds to hold the rag up to her face. She passes out, the man takes her into a nearby bedroom and rapes her. He casually leaves the party. He will most likely continue this vile act for years to come.

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knock knock. "who's there?" dick. "dick who?" dick ferns.

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What did the mother say to her son? Nothing, she was dead.

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A Rabbi walks into a bar. He does not order any alcoholic beverages, because Orthodox Jews aren't allowed to consume alcohol except for certain times and religious customs.

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What happened to the boy who stalked the pretty girl? His father raped him and he died in a house fire induced by his overwhelmingly sick love for the taliban

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Naturally I meant to say "Its no fun even when they DO scream in pain" below... What do you think I got? Pleasure? Your friendly r*pist Moral Man: Of course I got pleasure! ;) But I wont share with you!

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Have u seen stevie wonders new house? No. Niether has he

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If you throw a red stone in a blue lake what does it become? Simply a wet stone.

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A guy reads the bible Another guy shouts "spoiler alert, the main character dies"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops