How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died

How did the man want his hair cut? In silence.

What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

What is frowned upon no matter what country you're in? Sex on a plane.

When life gives you lemons, take them. Free stuff is cool.

Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

a woman walks into a bar, she was quickly kicked out and escorted back to the kitchen

Why was the chicken angry? Because he was tired of everyone questioning his motives.

A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

Roses are red Violets are blue Most rhymes rhyme But this one doesnt

two japanese men walk into a bar. the first japanese man says “i am japanese!” the second japanese man says “i am also japanese!” the bartender then says “well, hey. i’m japanese too”. the bar was in japan.

What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

Who ya gonna call? ... Whoever you need to talk to at the current time.

An englishman, a german and a ginger are in a band. they play some creative music that some people may find enjoyable to listen to and would like to purchase a track.

How do you make a cripple cry Cut of his legs, THEN telll him a joke

Who has a higher pitched voice than the average man? A woman.

why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a rapist

So i know this guy... yes? thats it.

What do you call an Aboriginal in a yellow sleeping bag? An organised man, ready for the harsh winter ahead.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

Yes

12 in general

The cream, it is coming

What did the Jewish man get for his birthday? Pork.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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