Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was holding on to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Pier pressure.

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What is square, brown, and smells funny? A box with a dead body in it.

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Why was the little girl crying? There was a frog stapled to her forehead.

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What did the slutty blonde get her boyfriend for Valentine's Day? Nothing because she had died of AIDS months ago.

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what did the homeless kid get for christmas? nothing he probably doesn't know what christmas is

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What's the difference between a jew and a boyscout? Boyscouts came back from camp

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What does an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

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Your mom is so fat she probably has a body mass index of between 25 and 30 which is considered to be "overweight" but paradoxically is associated with fewer health risks by medical professionals.

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what happens when a retard hits an iceberg with a gigantic boat? 1517 people die.

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Why did the man go to McDonalds? Because he was a pedophile.

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What do you get when you stab a baby? A dead baby.

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Potassium? K.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 raped 9.

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What's scarier than a ghost? Practically anything as ghosts aren't real.

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Why can't Hellen Keller watch Spongebob? She doesn't have the proper cable service

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What's worse than finding a hair in lasagna? An earthworm crawling into your ear and feeding on your intestines.

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How does a black man get to his parent's house on Christmas? He drives

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

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what do you say to your girlfriend just after the best sex you ever had? I really got great value for money tonight with my prostitute sweety. You should have been there

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Across the street was a strip mall containing a dry cleaners where he had to pick up his suit for his cousins wedding. The wedding caused controversy in the family considering she was jewish. He had a lot to drink and took a cab home, knowing the dangers of drunk driving in todays society. He had a great time.

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Has anyone else noticed that the very least popular and the most popular anti-joke on this site are both related to the Holocaust.

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Once upon of time, there was an ugly duckling. It was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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Im about to rewrite History....... History

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Why couldn't the immigrant who was brand new to America hold a conversation with anyone? He was mute.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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