What is small, red, and can't fit through a doorway? A baby with a spear through its head. Posted By: Lram

I dont think i could ever stab someone, I can barely get a straw through a capri sun

Kid One: "Hey, you! Do you know how to spell "I CUP'?" Kid Two: " Sure, F-A-G....G-O-T..." Kid One: ".........."

A cow and a whale are swimming in the sea when they both realize this is Vietnam and they were really chimps

What's another word for Manslaughter? My new Hobby

I'm trying to find out how many people in the world have Alzheimers, do you? No. Bananas.

Q: How did the dead baby get to the other side of the road? A: I threw it over there.

Why did the boy wear glasses? Because he had bad eyesight.

A jew walked out of a bar then goes to the other bar across the street then walks out from the back door to go to another bar The Actions of this jew tells us that there are only 3 bars in the zone and one pet shop

What's the difference between Rick Perry and a toaster? One is a republican presidential candidate, while the other is an electrical appliance.

Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

Friend: Dude are you going to see the hunger games? Me: But i alreay seen it Friend: Dafuq? its not even out yet. Me: African children invented the hunger games. Friend: -.-

A black guy wearing a mask runs into a store, points his gun at the cashier, steals some money and runs out. The police start an investigation the following morning

How did the chicken cross the road?he just got up and walked to the other side.

What's sweet and tastes like candy? Candy, now get in the van.

Man: Am i going to be alright? Doctor: No, you're going to die.

Rebecca black walked into a bar. She was then escorted out because she is under-aged.

Why couldn't the man ever reach his dream of becoming a professional athlete? He was pronounced with Alzheimer at a young age and could never remember his dream the next day.

BTMG JOAN!"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOP OF THE MORNING FREE MEAT NO SANTA THIS YEAR BONE FOUNDATIONS MOUNTNORRIS WHY IS THAT BAG MOVING?????????? MR MO MOLESTOR SHIT STAINS VEGETABLE GUN OPERATION SBB OPERATION SBB (THE AFTERMATH) #SL #NSL TIN SCHACK SKI LIFT MILK STAINS NATHAN: 5 - SEATS: 0 GREEK LETTER STU THE SO

What is hard, long, moist, and flesh colored? A hotdog you dirty, dirty bastard!

whats worse then getting a parking ticket? the plague

Why does the rabbit go in the hole? because that's where it lives.

So a blonde walks into a wall...

Roses are blue Violets are red It's fascinating what genetic engineering can do

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


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MOAR??

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