Why did Timmy's face hurt? Because there was a frog stapled to it.

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What did the alcoholic tell his son? Don't do meth.

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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Never go into your parents room with a blacklight.. -Ryan Vallee

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A musician without any music walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Who do you think you are, a hobbit?" The musician without any music says,"yeah" and turns into a hobbit

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Why did the boy kill his parents? Because he doesn't understand this joke either

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Guess what? What? You guessed correctly.

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Gay people: "Quit calling Justin Bieber gay, we don't want him either."

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When life gives you lemons, take them. Free stuff is cool.

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What's black and white and red all over? A black, white, and red shirt.

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y was John so sad becaus his mom took his phone

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What did the black kid down the road get for Christmas? Your Bike.

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How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Rocky was chasing him

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what do you give a little girl with no arms no legs and who lives in a orfanidge for christmas?.................................... nothing because no parent wants a freak kid

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Why did the robot cross the road? Because It was bionically fused to the chicken.

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How many Cancer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Cancer does not affect one's ability to install light bulbs.

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Situation: 2 cows eating grass on a warm Sunday night. Question: Why does 9+4=3 1/2? Answer: 69!

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What did the bank clerk say to the robber when he demanded all the money in the drawer? "Okay."

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How many babies could a cannibal eat? 132/267 of a baby

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why were the negros at whitney houstons funeral smiling? because there were free sandwiches!

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What do you get when you mix a polar bear and a dog? A dead dog.

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How do you make an elephant float? Who cares?

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Knock knock, Who's there Why did the chicken cross the road? Idiot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops