Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died.

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Why Cant michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he is dying of Parkinson's disease.

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Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

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What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

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Wanna hear a joke? Zeke friends Wanna hear a better jokes? Zeke with his friends

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roses are red violets are blue I can't rhyme refrigerator

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Where did the little boy go on vacation? His mother's funeral.

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What's black and at the top of a burning building? A paraplegic

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Why was the lemon wearing a blue shirt? Because its red shirt was dirty.

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Doctor Doctor Who? It is a science fiction show about a time traveller

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what do you call a child with bruises on his face? Child protective services.

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EVERYONE, CREATE LOVE NOT WAR.. Between Josh and Dylan... WILD.. PASSIONATE.. LOVE!

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The next person to submit a 'roses are red' 'joke', is cursed to always prematurely ejaculate from here until eternity

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor

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Tony Romo

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Theaters say silence is golden... Trap silence in a jar, make millions.

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What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? Neither one can ride a bicycle.

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why are you going to laugh at this its reallly dumb

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theres a taco and a blonde...who eats who? the blonde eats the taco.

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Why does Tim Teblow love men? Logan Cole told him to.

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You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you can't divide by zero.

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What's black, white and red all over? A race war

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teacher: what is your name? student: some people call me attractive (mx)

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why dont black people celebrate thanksgiving? kfc is closed on holidays

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops