you can either take the test now or on monday. (hand movement)

Your momma has such a bad pancreas that it releases insulin into her bloodstream all the time. NOT just in response to glucose.

A black man walks into a store with a ski mask on... what does he do?? he buys skiis.

a priest and a rabbi are walking down a road together the rabbi says: so your a priest how about that the priest says: fine ive read the bible a few times good book

Q.A duck walks into a bar and asks for grapes.What is the duck asking for? A. Nothing... Ducks can't talk

What did the retarded guy say to the other retarded guy? Youre Retarded

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He is promptly arrested for sexual harassment.

Why did Lindsay Lohan talk to her car? Because she's insane

How many electricians with a suitable ladder does it take to change a bulb? If the bulb fitting is now obsolete it may not be possible.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My farts stink, And so do you.

The schoolboy said to the bus driver, this is my stop the bus driver replied "no, we have a while to go yet"

Why was the asian boy abused? He got an B in math

A raptor and a Tyrannosaurus Rex walk into a bar. Everyone runs for their lives as the dinosaurs ate everyone who was too slow.

Q. Why doesn't a woman need a wrist watch? A. Because they're actually becoming generally obsolete with the advent of the cell phone.

Why were there only 5,000 Mexicans at the Battle of Alamo? They only had 1250 trucks.

Caroline Kelly...Tight Butthole

What do you call hunter ? An anerexic that is skinny as a tooth pick. Duh

Knock Knock! "Use the friggin' doorbell!"

A blonde runs into her house. She died in a tragic backdraft fire. Always check to see if the doorknob is warm.

let me tell u a dirty joke a guy fell in the mud.

What did the zen master say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything,

knock, knock Who's there? Statefarm... and we are always gonna be there for you

Q. Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? A. Because he had alzheimer's and couldn't remember how to ride a bike.

We are not even in the same country, and my eye becomes infected two times a minute or something so I wont be going anywhere. I mean, if you are some guy trying to be a girl in order to screw with me, let me first of all thank you for our exchange of ideas and concepts, and then say that if you are a guy, that likes other guys, then... Well, lets just say that if you are a man, that I don`t speak with men in general, takes away time I can spend with the ladies.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...