Knock Knock Nobody Nobody who? Nobody, did you not hear what I just said.

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Roses are Green Violets are Black Everything's different since I took crack

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what is worse than gay sex wiping your ass with sandpaper

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why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead. why;d the banana fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the monkey.

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Why was the blackman fired from his job? Beacuse he was late too many times which was unacceptable.

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What is Mary short for? She has no legs.

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A plane crashes on the border of canada and america, where do you bury the survivors? I lied there are no survivors and the bodies were incinerated by burning jet fuel so theres nothing to bury.

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What do you call an unconscious black man? An ambulance.

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Whats long and hard? a baseball bat

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Q: What did the fish say when it swam into a concrete wall? A: Fish don't have vocal cords that allow them to speak in a way discernable by humans, and if they did, it would just sound garbled and bubbly due to their being underwater.

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whats floppy and smells like trout? trout.

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Why did a black man toss a bowl into the air? Because he just got it from the microwave and it was extremely hot.

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Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the cupboard cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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hey I just met you, and this is crazy. I have alzheimers. Hey i just met you.

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How do you keep an elephant from charging? Ask nicely.

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Roses are red. Waffles are blue. Blue Waffle.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a brick.

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How did the fat man survive the plane crash? He didn't, he died like everyone else!

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why does the man appear fat he is

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Horse.

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How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? You can't

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What do you call a black man repairing a car? A mechanic who has worked very hard to gain his qualifiaction.

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Superman wears chuck Norris pajamas Just kidding superman is a fictional character and is uncapable Of owning pajamas

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Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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