roses are blue violets are red dont judge me

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How do you offend a black person? Call him a nigger.

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" Not Sally because she has no arms ~Sally jokes

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A snail buys a car from a dealership, and then asks the manager if he could paint a large S on the side of the car. The manager agrees, and the snail drives away. From the parking lot, the manager sees the car go straight on to the highway and get hit by a truck. Unfortunately, snails cannot drive.

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Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

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The Dalai Lama orders a slice of pizza for $2 and gives the cashier a $5 bill. He then realizes he hasn't been given any change, so he asks for his change. The cashier quickly apologizes and hands the Dalai Lama three dollar bills.

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What did the African get for dinner? Ebola Rice

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whats older than your mom? a tortoise that has been living more than a couple hundred years

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him what he would like. The man says,"I'm feeling light today so I'll just have some H2O." The man's friend says,"I'm feeling the same. I'll have some H2O, too." The second man died.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a muslim cleric walk into a bar. In Syria. Dead children.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Its the pizza man. Get your yellow no good keister off my property before I pump your guts full of lead. 1,2...10

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What is frowned upon no matter what country you're in? Sex on a plane.

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Duncan walks into a bar and is greeted by his friends Eric and Tom. Duncan tells them that his wife left and took the kids. Duncan then goes home and hangs himself.

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What is the difference between Julis Ceaser, and the moon? The moon is covered in rocks and craters, and Julis Ceaser is DEAD

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Immaculate Misconception - Motionless In White \m/

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Why did the blond paint in the nude? because she couldn't find her clothes, and wanted to express her emotions through art

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A guy wants to build his house out of bricks. So, he hires some experts and they build his house with bricks.

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Whats a black and white and red all over? i dont know...who spends their time researching this kind of stuff

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An anti-Semite, a Jew and an American walked into the bar. The barman said: "Hi, Sara".

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Why did the blonde jump off the bridge? She was clinically depressed and wanted to end her life

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Q:Why was 6 afraid of seven? A:Because seven ate (eight) nine

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Knock Knock Who's there? Gilbert Gilbert who? Goddamn it David just open the door

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Who swept the woman off her feet? A kidnapper

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What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops