How did Moses make his tea? He steeped the tea leaves for around 5 minutes in hot water.

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Q: How do you eat a dead baby? A: One piece at a time.

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A neutron walks into a bar. The barman says, "for you, no charge." The neutron replies, "very funny asshole, you're just going to put it on my tab after I pass out."

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Donald Trump

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Whats green and smells like a red apple? A green apple

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your mama's so ugly, she suffers from chronic deppression.

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? dead parents.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, We have your test results, You have cancer.

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flashback 2010 bears vs. packers vs. bears- why did'nt the packers want to go to soldier field? because they didnt want to pass another 6 flags!

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Guy 1 : "I like your hat." Guy 2: "That's my hair, you moron."

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Why did the clown's ballon animal pop? He was a victim in a drive by shooting.

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Why was the fat man crying? He was sentenced to the electric chair for a murder he didn't commit.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Teenage pregnancy.

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what do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you? run

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what do you get when you give a man viagra? A man with an erect penis. Viagra is known to increase blood flow and vascularization in the penis, allowing for erections for people with erectile dysfunction.

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salad days!

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Why didnt Timmy Go to school? He Died.

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What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? An ambulance.

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Two horses were discussing their racing records. The first said, "In my whole life I had won ten races." The second horse says, "Well, I've won twelve of those!" A greyhound trotting by chimes in, "Not bragging guys, but in my career, I've won twenty!" "Unbelievable!" exclaimed both horses. "It's a talking dog!"

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A blonde a red head and burrnett was on a island, heres there diolouge. Red:lets have a breast stroke race. bothe burnett and blonde:ok. The red head gets to the next island 1st and waits 2hrs,then the burnett comes up. Red:what took u so long? Burnett:i got hit by some waves.. they both wait weeks and weeks. the blonde comes . red and burnett: what took u long? Blonde:umm.... YOU GUYS CHEATED!! YOU USED UR HANDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What's worse that pooping in your pants having someone see it

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Q: Billy has 47 pieces of cake, he eats 38. What does he have left? A: Diabetes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops