Two girls are backpacking in the Sierra Nevada. They walk 8 km from their base camp at a bearing of 42 degrees. After lunch, they document the wildlife they have seen because they are tracking the populations of species native to the area. Then they continue on their hike, but this time at a bearing of 127 degrees. After 5 km, they reach their destination for the day and set up a temporary camp.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the man with cancer get for his birthday? A gravestone.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Your momma is so fat, she has her own gravitational pull.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because the mas of the ice-cream gathered up enough potential energy to increase the velocity of said ice cream making a mess on the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the man run away from the woman? He forgot his rape kit.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

There are 3 guys, a fat guy, a skinny guy, and sexy guy. They all work together and have lunch together. The fat guy opens his bag and eats a ham and turkey sandwich. The skinny guy opens his bag and eats a tuna sandwich. The sexy guy opens his bag and eats an egg sandwich. The fat guy finishes his meal. The skinny guy saves half for later. The sexy guy ate more than half of his food. A genie magically appears. The End

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A farmer and his son were walking to the well to fetch some water. The farmer stops, turns to his son and is mauled to death by a lion because they were in Africa.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

a man about 65 years old is tired with his life. he begins to realize that it is meaningless to him. whil on his way to commit suicide, he comes across a man with a magicul offer. the magical man is offering to grant him the power to fly. although, the magical man wants something in return. the 65 year old man, says to himself, "i have nothing to lose". so he gives the magical man all his money and possesions he has with him. with a flick of his wrist, the magical man says, "ok, you have now been granted the power to fly". the 65 year old man, overjoyed of how he has the ability to fly runs to the nearest cliff and jumps. too bad the magical man was really male prostitute broke out of money and tricked the 65 year old man into beleiving that he had magical powers to grant him the power to fly. the 65 yeard old man died from impact and the male prostitute walked away with a wallet full of money.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

hey whats your name Im gonna hit you so hard........ that im gonna knock your block off

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What did the catholic priest do to the little boy in the Confessions Took his confessions

thumb_up thumb_down -24

what did spiderman say before he saved mary jane? ill save you mary jane.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't suck its dick.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip? to ge to the same side

thumb_up thumb_down -24

…What did you put in the drink that made me fart, and kill my horse?

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What did the girl say to the guy who poked her on Facebook? You poked me.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

How does a penguin make pancakes out of skis? Purple because it's the best.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

How do black people vote? They go to their polling place, register, then vote for their candidate on election day.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

N-E Pats never cheated

thumb_up thumb_down -24

dylan wishes life was like cod. that way he would actually be able to do something cool

thumb_up thumb_down -24

How do u save a black person from drowning? Take ur foot off the back of there head

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What happened to the chicken that crossed the road? It got ran over by a car!

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares

thumb_up thumb_down -24

I got drunk last night and woke up in a bed and that's when I saw it. A 400 pound woman was in front of me and I could see the sweat drip down her ass fat and she let out a putrid fart right in my face. It smelt like rotten eggs and cheesy cauliflower. I am horrified.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

This girl came up to me and said she recognized me from the vegetarian club. Her name was Jill.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops