Knock Knock. Who's There? Nobody, this is a metaphorical door..

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What is green and smells like paint? Grass, it doesnt smell like paint, I lied.

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A woman walks in a confessional booth and proceeds to tell the priest about how she killed and ate her baby in a fit of hysteria because she is having issues dealing with her fresh divorce. The priest does not call 911.

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Albert <3 Hunter

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What did the dog say to the mailman? Woof.

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bob lost his camouflage bag. he never found it.

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Roses are red Violets are blue There's nothing else I want to say

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What does a grandmas vagina taste like? I don't know -- nor do I want to.

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What was in the magical purple teapot? Two dying pelicans.

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whats black white and red all over an abused child

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How many women can fit on a bus? It depends on the size of the bus.

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How did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the leg of a chicken.

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It couldnt because a chicken was obscuring its path.

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I dont think i could ever stab someone, I can barely get a straw through a capri sun

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how do you tune a piano, you dont, piano tuners tune a piano, I wasn't talking to you!

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You wanna know who else messes around a lot? My mom. Do you know who else has the best tacos in town? My mom. Do you know who else doesn't have time for this? My mom. She's a very busy woman; dealing with matters you'd expect a recently divorced mother would have to carry on her shoulders.

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What do Muslims have for breakfast? Corn Flakes.

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Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.

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Why did Austin Bell smell like tuna? He had sea food at Joes Crab Shack

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A catholic priest and Jerry Sandusky walk out of an elementary school.

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You're mom is so slutty, she has sex with many men.

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why did stuart buy an ipad from the mall. because he wanted an ipad

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Try not to laugh at this joke... Knock knock Who's there? Ha ha ha Ha ha ha who? I told you not to laugh

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What do an airplane and a grape have in common? They both have wings, except the grape.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops