You mama's so fat, that the doctor suggested that she go on a diet.

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How do you prevent a baby from crawling all over the place? You nail his hands to the floor

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust. Guys holocaust jokes aren't funny Anne-Frankly, I do nazi the point in them.

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what's worse then death? finding that your adopted, no one loves you and you mother raped you at the tender age of five.

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You must be Jamaican cause you have long dreadlocks and you are listening to Bob Marley

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Knock-Knock Who's there? A giant spider-like insect that lays eggs in your brain which turn into larvae that drop down onto your tongue and eat your teeth slowly, then form a cocoon and turn into the spider-like insect spoken of previously. You then wake up from this terrible nightmare and get ready for your well paying job.

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Guy: do u wanna hear a joke about my dick? Nah its to long Girl: Do u wanna hear a joke about my vagina? Actually that would make me very self concious I have ghonorrea and would appreciate not having to tell one.

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A preschool teacher told his class to draw a squirrel. One child proceeds to break into tears. The teacher says "what's wrong Johnny?" Johnny said "my whole family was slaughtered by a gang of squirrels!" this upset the teacher

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your friend: i did ur mom you: jokes on u my moms gross friend:.....

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What's the most popular fruit in the U.S.? Bananas What's the most popular vegetable in the U.S.? Stephen Hawking

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My friend and I were telling jokes the other day. Ha said " I've run out of dead baby jokes!" to which I replied " I've run out of dead babies."

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How do you have gay sex? I don't know ask Jordan Braun

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A strange man knocks at the door He's your son

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? An alive one at the bottom eating its way up.

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Rose are red, Violets are blue, I have AIDS, Now so do you.

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whats big fat round and bounces on the ground? a ball and your mum

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Chip and Dale walk into a bar. Chip is black now.

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your face is kinda funny

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What do the duck and elephant have in common?? Nothing, they are completely different species.

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What is smarter than a blind Mexican midget of average intelligence? A genius

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How do you get a black man out of your seat? You ask him very nicely with a great attitude.

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How do you make money? Kill babies and sell them.

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Why did the man go to Jupiter? Because he was on a mission for N.A.S.A.

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The funniest thing about this joke is that by the time you realise it doesn't say anything its to late to stop reading it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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