What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding Osama Bin Ladan in your refrigerator.

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What did the banana say to the tree? Nothing, bananas can't talk

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your mumma so fat when she stepped on the scales it said her phone number

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Q:What happens when you mix Justin Bieber with a women? A: Well, since is a very highly impossible circumstance, I have no need to give a name for this.

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We was all sat down at the table ready to eat then Gary must've said something to Lucy because she just burst into tears and left the table.

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Sarah Palin.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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A raptor and a Tyrannosaurus Rex walk into a bar. Everyone runs for their lives as the dinosaurs ate everyone who was too slow.

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if someone chucks skittles at u and says "taste the rainbow!!!!" chuck m&ms at them and say "Im not afraid!!!!!"

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what sucks blows and gets laid in the closet. YOUR MOM VACUMING

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Knock Knock? Why did you just say knock knock just ring the doorbell

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Did you fall from heaven? Because you look like Satan.

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A fat man orders a pizza. Then after eating it, he gets a eart attack due to his high cholesterol and lack of exercise

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Why doesn't the farmer have a dog? He doesn't like dogs.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead

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When does a cat not land on its feet? When it lands on its back.

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Q: What race was Jesus Christ? A: None, he's not real

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You know why no ones tried to kill Obama ? Picture him in an escalade!

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I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

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Whats cooler than cool? nothing because cool does not have a defined temperature therefore nothing can be cooler than it.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was a woman

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Your mother is of a healthy weight and a pleasure to be around.

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Did you know that there is a species of rodent capable of jumping higher than an average three-story building? This is due to its muscular hind legs and the fact that the average three-story building cannot jump.

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Knock Knock ...Does anybody know how to use a goddamn door bell these days?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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