What did the black guy say to the white guy? The black guy said, "hello". They then proceeded to have a normal conversation.

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What has four legs one head but only one foot? A dog that was born with physical deformities.

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Q: Do you know how to save a black man from drowning? A: No. GOOD!

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What do you call a black guy who flys a plane? A pilot.

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A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, build up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because I hit her with an axe.

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Hey Patrick what am i ? Ebola No im Texas! What's the difference?

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It's likely that very few people will read this.

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Doctor I have a headace! The doctor was dead.

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What's worse than finding a worm in an apple? Jokes related to finding a worm in an apple.

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What starts with 'd' and ends in 'ick'? dick -XH

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What did the doctor say to the person who is suffering from obesity? Run fatass Run

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Man: Knock knock Man 2: who's there Alzheimer's patient: to get to the other side!

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I farted and it smells like rotten ham with melted cottage cheese now dislike this please.

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A dog walks up to a puddle of pee and he starts to smell it

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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With all due respect, I do underestimate myself, there is not a single person I know that has not told me that, but if I wanted to, I would not even had to make the effort to have you removed, hell I had to pull favors and owe people things in order to keep you safe. I could have said the rest of you, but had I not known you, had you not been one of my co-workers back then, I would not have gone to the extremes that i did, you are beautiful, but what does that have to do with anything? Do you think that if I did not know you I would go "that one is sexy, release her?" Even if I did, I do not have authority, I work for them.

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What did the fork say to the spoon? I have tongs and you don't. Ha.

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Harry thrust his wand forward, "Expelliarmus!" Voldemort casually ducks, and fires a killing curse at our hero.

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How do you know when a blonde has been using your computer? If you're lucky some of his or hair will have fallen out and be left on the keyboard as evidence.

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Why did the horse say moo? Because it's a cow

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Roses are red, violets are blue. i have Alzheimer's, cheese on toast.

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Knock-knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Knock-knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Knock-knock Who's there? Banana Banana who? Banana you glad I didn't say banana?

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What do you call a jewish person at a construction site? A builder

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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