You thought i'd be telling you a joke. Turns out im not.. !! haha

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Why did the little boy fall over. Because someone shot him in the face.

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Hey, did you see that episode of Glee last night? It was awesome! Especially that scene where they all sang. It wasn't as good as the previous ones, but I think the show it making a comeback.

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why did the elephant cross the road? It was the chickens day off

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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Yo mama's so ugly, She cured cancer.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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What's green, has six legs and lives in the jungle? A Snooker Table.

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What is 6 1/2 inches when erected? My penis.

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Three cows are sitting in a field The first cow says, "MOOOO!" The second cow says, "MOOOO!" The third cow says, "MOOOO!"

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what has two lags and red all over? :a cat in a chinies restrunt...

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2 sheeps are outside having a great time One sheep walks up to the other sheep and says: hello The other sheep says: hello Now what I want to know: what ally do you get your drugs from

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why did the snow man die? Actually it is impossible because it was an inanimate object.

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How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Any number if compressed sufficiently. At neutron star density all babies in the world would fit.

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What do you call a guy named Bob hanging by a string? Plum Bob

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what`s green and flys a plain i was kidding about the green

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whats worse than sitting next to jack grindey nothing

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

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a guy walks into another tall man knowing that he has something weird in his mouth. he pulls out a fly, apologizes for running into him and promptly walks to his small appartment to brush his teeth. the next day a fridge hits him in the face and he spontaneously combusts. he was never seen again.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

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What's more epic than a man in a gorilla suit? A man i a gorilla suit with a banana.

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"Why isn't Bud capable of reading?" Bud is a stone "Why can't Peter drive?" Peter is a woman

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Eliz, Neo-Nero, its me Clint, had to fake my death for some years in order to get back to the order. Neo, I know Nero picked you as his successor, but honestly, I was his first choice, and I know you well enough to understand that things are getting out of hand over there. I will be there in 2 minutes Liz and you and I can meet up Neo, seriously what are you doing over there? Unless there is a problem do not bother answering, allow me to take charge of operations at least until tou calm down Neo, and unless you got problems with my absent authority I suggest you stop torturing people at once, and seriously if you cannot control your own people, you better let me back in charge. It is time to turn some things around guys, believe it or not but I found where the Spetz came from and I got em all, as for the Nazi scum they where just hired thugs and as far as my Intel goes most of those where taken down by Nero. Clint Lawman. Moral: "WTF? THESE ARE NOT EVEN MORALS! NO THESE ARE THE CODES WE USED TO AUTHENTICATE THE SOURCE AND SENDER OMG! ORLY? SRLSLY? LOL OMG!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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