What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a Mustang? I don't have a Mustang in my garrage.

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Whats better than 32 dead babies stapled to 1 tree? - 1 dead baby stapled to 32 trees

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I insist, you go ahead. See you around. how about in four six hours?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i know where you live now I'm coming for you

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how did the guy in the wheelchair cross the road he didnt he got dragged down the street cause his chair was hooked to the bus

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Get a ladder and help him down

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Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

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What is white and tastes like cotton candy? Jizzz

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Knock knock! Who's there? F*ck. F*ck who? F*ck you.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Oh..wait...that's actually an anti-joke already...

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting yours asshole clawed by a grizzly

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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What did the mother say to her son when she saw his report card? I don't know. I wasn't there.

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Q: What's grey and can't climb trees A: A car park

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A shoemaker walks into a bar holding a shoebox with only one shoe inside. The bartender gives him a drink and asks "Say mister, why are you carrying that shoebox with one shoe?" The shoemaker says "Well sir, it's a long story." The bartender says "Okay, give me the short version." The shoemaker says "Okay, long story short, I'm not really a shoemaker." The bartender asks "Well buddy, what are ya?" The shoemaker gets up from his chair and says "I'm a guy missing shoe."

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- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - What? Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

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an american walks out of a strip club.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock Whose there? Obviously not Suzie.

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are you MC Donald's because I'm lovin' it!

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There are two jews in an oven. One says "It sure is hot in here" and the other says "AHH A TALKING JEW"

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A- a tv

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Why are gay guys so good at being gay? The black guys told them too.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut you racist bastard

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Why did the rose look so brown? Because it was dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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