what do you call an animal thats black and white and red all over? an elephant

hey! have you seen that clown at Walmart that hides from gay people?

Why is Blake dumb? He was in algebra one as a freshman. And his nickname is angry Blake

Why did the black dude die? Because everyone must die at some point.

A man died in a sky-diving accident. What was the last thing that went through his mind before he died? His feet

There's a blind man walking on the south coast of England. He walks off a cliff.

Why were 5 tall white guys sitting on a bench? They were in the NBA

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

Knock Knock whose there your parents your parents who your parents just got malled by a hobo with an axe.

What happened to the Jewish child that used to live life like a normal kid? Him and his family were taken to a ditch and shot to death. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm bad at poetry, ELEPHANTS!

How many alcoholics does it take to change a light bulb? Look. I just enjoy a few drinks every now and then. I mean, I can quit whenever I want to. That's no reason to start people calling names.. Wait, no. That's not.. Look. How much do you drink every day, huh? Why not ask that? And why do I have to be the one changing your stupid light bulb? If it's sooooo important that the light bulb be changed, do it yourself, you lazy bastard. Don't rely on other people to do your work for you.

Two black guys run into a bank with guns. They place them in their pre-payed safety deposit boxes and continue on their way as they were falling behind on their schedule.

Betty wanted to see time fly so she threw her alarm clock out the window. Shortly after, her mother grounded her as it was quite expensive and she had become less punctual without it.

Okay so there was a turtle, a pig, and a donkey. They were out fishing when suddenly they spot a man in boat. The man said he hasn't eaten in 5 days and he is very hungry. He looked at the turtle and said "no, too much shell." The turtle was happy and left. He looked at the pig and said "no, too much fat." The pig ran away and was very happy. He looked at the donkey and said "I think I'll have donkey today." The donkey ran away because he was scared. The man died from hunger.

Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? Because it was summer and the grass had extensive growth, so much so, that it proceeded to spread to his neighbors yard. His neighbor then called HOA, and thus, the unruly grass was taken care of.

What happened to the pleasure robot he pleasured someone in the pussy

When lives gives you lemons you might just be dyslexic, because life cannot actually give you lemons

Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange ya glad i didn't say banana

why has kallum just changed clothes to speak to a counsellor because he's socially awkward and has no peers

Knock Knock. Who's there? Chris. Chris who? Wow, I thought we were better friends than that.

Why can't Molly ride her bike? Because she has no arms or legs. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Molly.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He flapped his wings, hovered, and the road crossed beneath him.

Your Mom is so fat.... When she's goes to McDonald's and orders 3 Big Macs the people standing in line behind her all look at her with disgust and a tinge of pity.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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