Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Did you hear about that creepy guy on Facebook? He was un-friended

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Two frogs go to the bar only to leave because frogs can't open up doors.

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FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-

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what do you call 10 black people in a red car? overcrowded

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A devout Islamic man walks into a weapons of mass destruction store he is shocked and appalled at how easily such dangerous weapons can be bought.

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-Why did the chicken cross the road? '' I dont know '' -Because it would cross the road and over to you. -Knock knock? '' Who's there?'' - CHICKEN!!!!!!!

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What did the fish say when he ran into a cement wall? ....Nothing fish don't run What did the fish say when he swam into a cement wall? ...Damn

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How do you make a baby stop crying?you scream at it and throw it at wall

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What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

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What happened to the guy who dropped his soap in the prison shower? His friend picked it up for him.

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-Your mom worked as a prostitute and died a virgin.

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A fish didn't walk into a bar, because fish cannot walk.

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I will grant you one wish, but it sure as hell isn't coming true!

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Three Arabian men are on a plane, they stand up, and shout BOMB, BOMB, BOMB! All three have Tourettes.

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Have you heard of the dog that sounds like Megan fox? No Oh, well ummm apperantally there's this ummm dog that sounds like Megan fox. So ummm yeah. Pretty interesting stuff

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Why did the man lose the spelling bee? He was mentally retarded and had no friends.

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Q.Why did Bruno Mars marry the blond? A.Because it was a beautiful night and he was looking for something DUMB to do.

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how do you know your sister is on her period? you dads dick taste like blood.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his wife in the hospital. She has terminal cancer.

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Why did the little girl pull her hair out? She didn't, It's a side-effect of the chemotherapy.

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What do you do if an elephant comes through your window? Pay For a new window

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a duck walked up to a lemon aid stand and he said to the man running the stand... quack

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Why did the chicken cross the road?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops