Why was Martin Luther King shot? The shooter strongly disagreed with his viewpoints.

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Friend: Dude are you going to see the hunger games? Me: But i alreay seen it Friend: Dafuq? its not even out yet. Me: African children invented the hunger games. Friend: -.-

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How can you tell if a duck is under your bed? Look under your bed

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What's the only part of a vegetable you cant eat? The wheelchair

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Why didn't the mexican make the basketball team? He had never practiced and was overweight

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I met a hot girl in the Tampon aisle and i asked if she wanted to hang out in 5-7 days

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Q: What does Jerry Sandusky and bills have in common? A: They both come in the mail

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What did the farmer say to the cow that asked for food? No.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting your car repossessed.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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A man drove up to a drive-thru. He ordered a coke, but the lady at the window spilled it on his lap. He promptly changed his clothes and accepted the lady's apology.

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A man and wife were having a vacation when suddenly the man falls to the floor and starts having a seizure. The woman screams "Oh my God, is there a doctor in the house?!" Then a doctor appears and helps the man with the appropriate method of handling a seizure. The doctor says everything is going to be okay.

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what is purple and smells like poop? very weird looking poop

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What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

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Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of four.

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Why did a black man toss a bowl into the air? Because he just got it from the microwave and it was extremely hot.

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Wanna hear a joke? No? Oh

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What do you call a group of black people in a lamboghini..... Unlikely

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. *Knock knock* "Who's there?" "Not Sally."

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what do you call an octopus with 9 tentacles? a male octopus

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay guys house Knock Knock Who's there? The chicken

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Why was the man dress in a suit ? He had a job

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How many babies does it take to paint a barn? It depends on how hard you throw them

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops