George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

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Haikus are easy Im happy when I write them Thats pretty much it

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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GINGERVITIS! 1. redhair 2.freckles 3.no soul 4.depression/anger 5.gay JLR

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why has kallum just changed clothes to speak to a counsellor because he's socially awkward and has no peers

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Why didn't the ghost go to the dance? He didn't exist.

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Justin's life

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An airplane flies due north at 100 m/s through a 30 m/s cross wind blowing from the east to the west. Determine the resultant velocity of the airplane.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one, but he may forget to finish the task due to his Alzheimer's.

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Why did the horse go to the doctor? It had a heart disease.

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what happens when you step on a bear trap? Alot of pain.

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What did the schoolgirl say to some of the people of Anti-Joke.com? You're sick. Stop talking about the Holocaust.

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Why was the lady afraid of rocks? Because her husband was stoned.

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What's worse than finding 16 dead babies in a tree? Finding 1 dead baby in 16 trees.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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Whats funnier than a dead baby? a dead baby in a clown costume!!!

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How do you fit 10 babies in a bowl? With a blender. How do you get them out of the bowl? You don't, you've already been arrested for multiple cases of infanticide.

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the man walked into the bar and said ur gay

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what do you call a black man who bakes bread? a baker. you racist.

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Why'd the aborted fetus cross the road? 9/11

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If life hands you melons. Your probably dyslectic.

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What sits on a shelf and says hey im a book? A person who thinks hes a book.

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bologna

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What did the White guy say to the Black Guy? Nothing... he looked him up and down and spat at him instead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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