don't take life to seriously nobody gets out alive

Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

They found Michael Jackson dead in his house and found Madeleine McAnn in the cupboard 8P

So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

What's up? Your time.

What do you call a black pilot? A PILOT

The queen having a shit

Lasers are red, Tasers are blue, and I will use them, to kill you!

It's good to be a scientist and great to be a biologist. However, it is never okay to be a scientologist.

Turkeys are obese

Q:Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? A: Neither did she

So, a monkey walks ino a bar... I can't remember the rest of the joke, but your mother is a whore.

Roses are red, violets are blue, your face belong in the zoo, don't worry I get there too, not in the cage, just visiting you :)

How many different ways can you kill a cat? 27, unless you live in Russia then it's 28

Whats red and has wheels? An apple, I was just kidding about the wheels.

Why did the young boy fail his math test? Because he had down syndrome.

A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

Q: What Did Alakazam Use To Listen Gangnam Style? A: He Used Psybeam.

(two firefighters are climbing an undersea mountain in Brazil) Why do elephants fear the natural causes of silver icecream cones? Because the cars in the parking garage jump the moon while doing jumping jacks.

hey whats your name Im gonna hit you so hard........ that im gonna knock your block off

Knock Knock Whos There? I'p I'p who? HAHAHAHA

What did the kid with no arms get for his birthday? A sock puppet.

a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are stranded at sea,the brunette swims 1 quarter of the way to shore, gets tired and drowns.The redhead swims 3 quarters of the way to shore, gets tired and drowns. The blonde swims half the way to shore, gets tired and swims back.

what did the guy say to the goose? i know you don't understand but my life sucks. my wife just dumped me for another man and my kids hate me. thank you. you are the only one to understand.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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