A man is pulled over for drunk driving, and is asked to say the alphabet backwards. When requested to do so, the man says, "officer, I can't even do that when I'm sober," thus admitting that he is drunk. The police officer chuckles at the drunk man's stupidity, and wonders whether or not his wife would find the incident funny. After all, they do share a similar sense of humor.

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A man goes up to an old friend and says: "Help me, I just found out that my friend is gay! What should I do!?" The other man replies: "If there is no problem, I cannot help you... Yet, there is one. Your homophobia. I suggest that you see a therapist immediately and I hope that you can get over the fact of the contemplation of a sexuality."

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A brunette, a redhead, and a blond are all stuck on an island 100 miles away from the nearest civilization with no resources. After 2 weeks, they decide that no one is going to save them and they have to swim for it. The brunette swims 25 miles and then gets eaten by sharks. The redhead swims 75 miles and then drowns. The blond swims 99 miles but got tired, so she swam back.

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Your mama was so fat that when she did the splits she gave the floor a hickey

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? That depends on a variety of factors.

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I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one . Though , I do have cancer .

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I am the best i am the worst My wife was buried in hearse

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How do you kill a Jewish person? Like any other person, they are like any other person of any race and religion.

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What did one dog say to the other? Nothing silly...dogs can't talk.

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Know what im sayin'? No but im wearing pants

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Why did they bury the firefighter behind the hill? Because he was dead.

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Why do aliens listen to relaxing music while they have sex? They like to cum in peace. \m/

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Why did the girl call suicide hotline? Cuz he wanted to kill herself.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Just kidding, he didn't cross the road, he had no legs.

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What's worst then a parking ticket? The plague

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy but your adopted banana

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bunnies are fluffy just like yo mama

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What did the teenage boy do when his mum was out shopping? Finish his homework.

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Inspirational story: There once was an ugly old man who was so ugly everyone died. The end -Matt

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Fred: Hey man where were you last night. Steve: Why don't yo ask yo mama.

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL Wasted your time didn't I -All the lol post are by me, LOL GUY.

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Get on the boat.

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What is the cost of an abortion? 1 life

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Knock Knock Who's there? Police officer Police officer who? Police officer your whole family died in a car wreck last night.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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