Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The pilot was a potato.

What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

Texas! You are doing it the wrong way! Learn from Hitler, gas is cheaper.

Why did the man get a DUI? Because he was driving under the influence.

Your mama so fat that when she cut herself gravey came out and we drank it too!

What do you call something green and fuzzy? Grass, I lied about the fuziness.

Why can't bob fix it? I through a frige at him.he died.

What's the best thing about the Pixies? Their music.

Whats the difference between a black man and a bike? I don't enjoy riding bikes.

whats red and brown and goes about 30mph? a squirrel in a blender.

What's the only animal that has to be oiled? any animal I can think of

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, My vagina is Red, Im on my period.

Jesus on the cross promised he would return rite? So three days later he returns in ghost form and leaves. So why people still waiting for him? He returned and left already! (Lack of Moral?): The third coming: this summers blockbuster hit!

Why are all the other numbers scared of 7? Beacuse 7 stabbed his mother with a steak knife.

where did little Suzie go after the bomb went off? Everywhere.

your mommas so fat she should be worried about getting diabetes

Why did the mailman die? Because everybody dies.

Justin Bieber

what do u call a newspaper boy on brake? your uncle because hes broke and struggling with income.

What is worst than a black guy hanging on a tree. A burnt black guy hanging on a tree

A priest, a rabbi and a scientologist walk into a bar. They discuss their various religious viewpoints until the scientologist gets a call informing him of his mother's death. The priest buys him a drink. Then the priest gets a call informing him of his mothers death. The rabbi buys him a drink. The rabbi gets a call. The scientologist expects it to be about the rabbi's mother dying, so he prematurely buys him a drink. It was actually the lottery commission telling the rabbi he won 48 million dollars.

A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, building up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

Brian knew how to save the world from the death penalty: "Let's kill everybody who is not against it." So I killed Brian and waste my time in death row now.

A guy walks into a bar, unfortunately for him, he walked in on a huge bar fight and managed to get the hell knocked out of him as he entered the door.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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